Best of BP: The MLB Executive Winter 2023-24 Text Thread

Image credit: © Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

NICK KRALL: [Posts Frankie Montas press release]

A.J. PRELLER: Yeah man we saw

KRALL: Just making sure

KRALL: No one said anything..

PRELLER: What’s everybody up to

MIKE ELIAS: [Posts link to story on winning Executive of the Year]

DAVE DOMBROWSKI: [yawning cat .gif]

ANDREW FRIEDMAN: [picture of himself with Shohei Ohtani and Yoshinobu Yamamato building gingerbread house]

FRIEDMAN: That was a real nice try on Yamamoto Dave

FRIEDMAN: Too bad you had to go after us

DOMBROWSKI: Nice moves sending the entire middle of your batting order to badger him. And that Kobe shit was weird af

FRIEDMAN: [Shrugging emoji]

DOMBROWSKI: Freeman shoulder-checked Middleton as he passed us going in. Sent him flying into a potted plant. Dirt everywhere

FRIEDMAN: lol

JED HOYER: Just pulled up to Nightengale’s house with a box of Uncrustables to throw. I can see him through the window.

PRELLER: What

KRALL: Jed don’t!

KRALL: He’s just trying to have a nice holiday!

HOYER: Holiday’s over bitch.

HOYER: How’s this for a “stern exchange.”

KRALL: But he was right, you didn’t GET Ohtani!

HOYER: YOU don’t get it Krall. This is about respect.

PRELLER: You are 50 years old dude

HOYER: You sound like my son

CASHMAN: Go to Sherman’s house next

CASHMAN: My kids asked me what my Christmas wish was this year and I said “to stick a pen in Joel Sherman’s eye”

FRIEDMAN: That reminds me did we ever find out who gave everybody diarrhea

CASHMAN: That was all your fault for eating a lunch buffet in *scottsdale*

CASHMAN: Also if somebody asks me about these City Connect jerseys one more time I am giving Judge his outright release. I don’t give af anymore

CASHMAN: Now I’ve got to have this lady from the MLB Flagship Store secretly killed.. Waste of my gd time

CASHMAN: Siri delete crimes

CASHMAN: Siri delete jokes

CASHMAN: Siri delete crimes that I meant as jokes

DAVID STEARNS: Cash do you have a starter I can have? Like a guy you could just put on the 4 train.

STEARNS: Just drank three glasses of wine and decided I can’t start a guy named “Butt-o.”

FRIEDMAN: Those jersey sales tho

STEARNS: Don’t talk to me about jersey sales Friedman.

STEARNS: You’ve got the only jerseys people want to buy.

FRIEDMAN: Who, these guys? [posts gingerbread picture again]

STEARNS: gdi

FRIEDMAN: Is Cohen healing yet from this off-season’s humiliations

STEARNS: Oh man

STEARNS: THAT guy

KRALL: He seems fine?

STEARNS: After Ohtani’s agent never called, he hurled that head sculpture made of frozen blood at the wall.

STEARNS: And when Yamamato turned us down he played Baldur’s Gate 3 for 96 hours straight.

PRELLER: That dude is tough to nail down

STEARNS: No shit

PRELLER: I said hi to him at the GM Meetings but he said he was just there to campaign for Andrew Yang.

STEARNS: Uh oh

STEARNS: Campaign for what?

PRELLER: ?????

ELIAS: You guys should see Angelos try to open a snack

ELIAS: He tries to play it off like he’s not using every ounce of strength and still failing

ELIAS: Then he hands it to an assistant, tears in his eyes

PRELLER: Mike, why’d they make the Oriole Bird go to that ceremony about the lease

ELIAS: That was me dude

ELIAS: I made the mistake of having a meeting with Angelos after he’d just seen the Bloomberg story on David Rubenstein

ELIAS: He was like “YOU HAVE TO BE THE BIRD NOW”

ELIAS: Had no idea wtf he was talking about

ALEX ANTHOPOULOS: [Press release on Chris Sale trade]

PRELLER: Uh ok dude

BEN CHERINGTON: wtf

CHERINGTON: I thought we said no spending this year

FRIEDMAN: YOU said that.

PRELLER: You always say that

CHERINGTON: Uh, McCutchen much?? Yeah thanks

FRIEDMAN:

CHERINGTON: People love him.

PRELLER:

CHERINGTON: Shut up

KRALL:

FRIEDMAN: Stop trying to be like us Krall

KRALL: What do you mean

KRALL: We’re all just a bunch of dick-swinging execs, making deals and eating steaks

FRIEDMAN: jfc

PRELLER: Don’t do this

KRALL: ???

KRALL: [Posts Frankie Montas press release]

KRALL: [Press release gets thumbs-down’d repeatedly]

HOYER: Holy shit Nightengale owns a gun

HOYER: A big one

PRELLER: Obviously AA isn’t going to talk about it but how did this Sale trade happen, Breslow?

CRAIG BRESLOW: You know I can’t really remember

BRESLOW: I feel like Anthopoulos brought up Vaughn Grissom at the buffet line in Scottsdale and then everything just went black

BRESLOW: But when I came out of it, Grissom just kept popping into my head. And the second I’d think about calling Anthopoulos, he’d be calling me to talk figures.

KRALL: I’ve heard that’s what trading with him is like

JERRY DIPOTO: It totally is

FRIEDMAN: Jerry we’ve all gotten enough voicemails from you with just heavy breathing to know you get a little excited to make any kind of deal

DIPOTO: I told you! I just roll over on my phone while I’m sleeping

FRIEDMAN: Is that how you shed all that payroll too

DIPOTO: It’s called being aggressive

DIPOTO: And also prudent

HOYER: He’s a good shot too. Just blew the head off a flamingo statue.

HOYER: I’m texting while blasting through red lights

HOYER: Are you guys getting these

Thank you for reading

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